Lord of the Rings

Lord of the Rings comes up often here. I am forever hearing comments such as:

‘Oh, we are really in Lord of the Rings territory now.’

‘Can’t you just imagine the hobbits walking to Mordor?’

blah blah blah blah blah blah blah

A very pretty waterfall

I have a problem with these comments. My logic goes like this (and is probably flawed, but I don’t want to know):

Lord of the Rings is filmed in New Zealand.

New Zealand is home.

Iceland is not home, nor does it look like or seem like home in anyway.

Therefore, Lord of the Rings is home, and not Iceland.

A very pretty view

Despite liking the movies, I would not say that I particularly identify with any of the characters.

On Saturday, we went adventuring to some lava caves – a rather Gollum like environment. These caves were rather large and the floor was covered in piles of rocks. This made walking rather difficult, especially if you are the forward thinking individual such as myself and forget a headlamp.

Gollum's cave

My iPhone light proved useful in this situation. However, taking one of my hands, having no wrist strap (because wrist straps are kind of like Crocs – lame) and being a bit of a durrie, tripping of course leads to the overriding of the body to do stupid things, like letting go of your phone.

Which happened.

Now, I consider myself a fairly laid-back person. Not a lot of things wind me up. Most of the time, I just find things funny. This was not one of those times.

Forward-thinking individuals

My one and only thought was:

‘Fuck fuck fuckity fuck.’

Hindsight, being the wonderful thing that it is, has led me to believe that is the less politically correct way of Gollum screaming:

‘Lost! Lost! My precious is lost!’

The cold light of day

Luckily though, my phone had not continued on into the abyss and luckily, I had brought some friends with unnaturally long arms (which would normally just be weird, but on this occasion proved rather helpful).

Eriksjökull

So, I have come to the conclusion that I identify most with Gollum.

I find this seriously worrying and disturbing. 

Intellectuals

Some weeks, I have self-realisations. This week, I had one of those. I have had this thought before, but it was highlighted this weekend, when I spent a weekend with a group of intellectuals.

Ugla keeping watch

I realized that I know sweet nothing about a great deal many things.

The intellectual bunch

I had known that I enjoyed talking smack and having nothing conversations, however, it was not until this past week that I had had it confirmed that this was a New Zealand trait, rather than just me.

The ponies

On Skype this week:

My friend excitedly told me that she had been at the gym recently and much to her great amusement, somebody had fallen off the treadmill. You’ve got to have to some legitimate reason to go to the gym.

The birds, the bees, the flowers and the sea

My sister told me, giggling away to herself, that she had been to a wedding, only for the newly weds to have the horrible misfortune of missing their plane to their honeymoon destination. Perhaps a foreshadowing of their relationship? Let’s hope not. But an amusing incident all the same.

Snapped a pic of the most photographed mound in Iceland

My sister also told me about her colleague who had annoyingly been 'reminding' her about washing her hands and hygiene in general, while working at the hospital. Much to my sister's satisfaction, her colleague was the victim of gastroenteritis. Unfortunate, but those kind of people are really annoying. Karma can be a bitch.

A town

This weekend just past, the topics of conversation were literature, philosophy, language, politics and history.

Not cold at all...

It made me think about what we talk about if my friends from home and I try to talk about any of the above topics.

Literature: Did you read Twilight?

The coast-line

Philosophy: I had a deep thought the other day. But I can’t remember it now.

Snaellfellsjökull

Language: English is the universal language.

House of enlightenment (I need to live here)

Politics: John Key is a dweeb.

The beach (The bitch?)

History: Stuff happened before I arrived on Earth? Doubt it.

Lifting Stones Beach - my own translation

It wasn’t a complete bust though, with good friends, perfect weather, northern lights, seals, dolphins, whales, and cake, my weekend could have been worse.

Adventure Day

I think that it would be fair to say that I have a rhythm here now. I have permanent plans every night of the week. If that’s not rhythm, structure and settled, I don’t know what is.

Friday is designated Adventure Day.

It has become Adventure Day, because Thursday night (normally) does not require recovery. And I have no class. And that way, if your plans fail, the rest of the weekend is still available for doing things. Getting out and about. Seeing the world. Witnessing wonders. Or doing nothing. Whichever I prefer.

Not a bad day for Iceland

Adventure Day last week consisted of a glacier hike. Unfortunately, I am under the influence of enough non-Kiwis to have started calling it hiking…

Despite the terminology, it was cool.

I nearly died.

That wee anomaly in the far distance is the top

Snaefellsjökull

Not because we didn’t have an ice axe at all in the group. Or a rope. Or a helmet. Or use our crampons. But because it was a beasty hill. And I’d only had about 4 ½ hours sleep. And now I am making excuses for myself, which is embarrassing.

That black dot is a person

But admittedly, it was a long way up. 1, 446 m to be precise.  Not that anybody was counting. Apart from me. I counted. I’m not kidding. Sometimes there is only one way up. And that is by counting. So that is what I did.

A side slope

Every time we stopped I thought:

Well, it’s quite nice here. Will walking up the hill really make me happy?

Which it did. Eventually.

Almost there

Not a bad view from the bottom

Or from the top

At the conclusion of this adventure, I decided that was enough adventuring for one week and proceeded to enjoy festivities organised for St Paddy’s Day, which started two days before the actual day and stretch three days afterward.

Because it’s Iceland.

And there is little else to do but eat, sleep, drink and be merry.

So we ate, slept, drank and were merry.

Anecdotes

This week, I have four short and unconnected anecdotes, accompanied by a few random photos from the week’s expeditions to share with you.

Continental rift - full of money

Anecdote 1: The Ginger and the Disabled

This story didn’t happen to me, but a friend, but I enjoyed it so much, I thought it was worth sharing. 

My friend has ginger hair. Or ‘ranga. Or whatever you like to call it. This week, he was out and about, on the town, when he decided to invest in waffles before missioning home. While there, that a man in a wheel chair came up to him out of the blue and stated, simply and clearly:

I would rather be disabled than ginger.

Point blank. I mean, at least he’s honest right?

I couldn't help but wonder if he would have rather been ginger or albino?

Anecdote 2: Snowball

It has been snowing all week here. Needless to say, that snow = snowballs. I suppose the fun thing about snowballs is that you can throw them and not get hurt… so it’s fun.

Plenty of snow for snowballs

Unless you’re me. And you don’t know your own strength. And you pack the snowball nice and tight. Then hit somebody square in the face.

Plenty more snow to make more snowballs

He’s claiming a black eye. Or at least a slightly swollen one. I’m claiming he’s a pussy. And should definitely stop complaining.

Somebody starts crying - that's not fun, that's just awkward 

Anecdote 3: What’s my age again?

I told somebody this week that I was 20 years old, but they misheard me (often happens here) and comprehended 28 years of age. To my horror, they were very accepting of this fact, before I hurriedly corrected them. I feel old enough as it is, without people genuinely believing that I am 28… However, I did go to a 30^th birthday party in the weekend… Which was also slightly disconcerting.

Geysir (not the original) also a little disconcerting

Anecdote 4: School

The swimming pool that I normally swim at here, is located directly opposite a primary school. This week, as I was leaving the swimming pool (minding my own business), I heard some children call out to me. Wondering what they could possibly want with me, I looked over, only to see them holding up a sign that said:

Fuck you

That was all. Little punks.

A rather peaceful scene, despite the kids here... 

I have decided my life is a comedy.

Fatcat and Fishface

When I was little, I was given this CD by my loving uncle called Horrible Songs For Children, by Fatcat and Fishface.  There was one song in particular, that really resonated with me. It is called Lazy.

Verse 1

I would but I couldn’t

I should but I can’t

I just can’t be bothered

My motor won’t start

You can go your own way....

This past week has been a particularly hard one.

I had to do more than no work for university for a change. So I was off to a bad start… And then I went hiking.

I'm walking on sunshine...

Let’s be honest here, walking down the mountain is so annoying. You’ve done all the hard work to get to the top, and then you have to saunter back down for hours, just so you can leave.

Up, up and away...

But then my friend slipped about 50m and I remembered the song…  

I realized the stupidity of our ways. Why walk when you can slide? We flagged the walking idea and slide the rest of the way that snow cover and gravity would allow.

However, this method of transport is not recommended for electronics. Especially rogue electronics that like to wander off by themselves.

Take me higher...

Another of our party, still at the top, decided he wanted to listen to music. Rookie error. You never want to listen to music at the top of a steep and slippery mountain

He dropped his phone. We, lower down, moved to stop it. Then his phone split into three. And we gave up. Not that we had tried very hard. We watched the dismembered phone float past us, into the abyss and beyond.

I'm on top of the world...

Somewhat later, I got sick of walking all over again. I decided to take up the sport of penguining. I’m coining a new term.

Penguining: the sport of sliding on one’s stomach with the force of gravity, thus re-enacting the act of a penguin.

As for everything else:

Verse 2

I’ll do it tomorrow

I’ll be there next week

Wait just a minute
While I have a sleep